partner’s birthday

Photo by Genaro Servu00edn on Pexels.com

It was my partner’s birthday yesterday. I got up early, put out prepared foods we got at Costco, opened a bottle of sparkling wine and celebrated with a pound cake also from Costco. We watched the season finale of ‘Heroes Season 3’ and comedy shows. I made every effort to fill the party with fun.

In the end, my partner asked me to relax and act normally. He felt pressured to have fun because of my tension and begged me to make him pressure-free on this particular day. I tend to go overboard on everything. To me, nothing is ever enough and I feel something missing all the time. I spend a lot of energy looking for the missing piece which may or may not exist. And as usual, I was exhausted by the end of his birthday…

 

Episode From Surviving in Japan by Hidemi Woods

Audiobook: The Family in Kyoto: One Japanese Girl Got Freedom by Hidemi Woods On Sale at online stores or apps. Apple Books, Google Play, Audible 43 available distributors in total.

Audiobook:  Japanese Dream by Hidemi Woods On Sale at online stores or apps. 
Apple Books, Google Play, Audible,   43 available distributors in total.

free time brought back bad memories and regrets

Lately I’ve been depressed which is so unlike me. I wonder why. Is it because I fell for a scam of an auction website? Or because the holiday season is past and there is a long way to have the next one? Or because Carrefour is closing for good? I thought I might be simply tired and took the day off two days in a row. I was going to be relaxed, do nothing and refresh my mind. Instead, the free time brought back bad memories and regrets from my past and I felt more negative…